It was brought to my attention last night that my last 4 posts made it seem like Oliver is not a good Dom. I'd like to say several things about this.
1. What I write about is coming from my end of things and how I am feeling at that moment.
2. No one else but Oliver is aware of what has happened in my past and He acts accordingly due to that knowledge.
3. Although I do enjoy chatting to people everywhere, in no way do I need to be saved from Oliver or to be told that He is doing things wrong. You see no one but He can be my Dom, because He is the only one that knows me and can know what is best for me.
Again, what I am writing here is coming from my perspective, my view. Oliver always has a perfect reason for doing what He does. I'm like that child complaining about it, when the parent knows better.
So Oliver and I had a good talk last night. He explained (actually more like spoke very sternly - even swore at me a few times) to me about a few things, and then pretty much told me He is sick of my shenanigan's and going forward He will no longer be so easy on me. I will be punished, and fierce. He explained that I will not like the punishments and that they will not be fun.
At the end of the conversation I felt completely scolded and upset. But guess what? It was exactly what I needed. I feel that my head is back in the right place now. Like something snapped and I am ready to begin being His perfect submissive. I think that I needed to see that when it comes down to it I really couldn't/can't "get one over" on Him. For some reason I needed some sort of proof or something in order to believe He really is in charge. Perhaps I had some sort of doubt? He's has now made it perfectly clear to me that He can be very stern and will be very stern if I pull any bs anymore. He's put that bit of fear in me that I needed. Now I have no desire to be punished. I'm scared of what the punishments will be. I don't want to know what they will be.
I hate to say it, but I'm very glad that this has happened. I feel so much better now.
I also have to say that I can no longer call Him Oliver because I don't think that it's appropriate. I can only call Him Daddy now. I feel that calling Him Oliver would be disrespectful, and that is something that I never want to be. There is another name I call Him as well, which I may use in the future. Captain. As He is the Captain of my life.
I am very much looking forward to Saturday. I very much need the physical from Him. Not that we haven't had little quick sessions here and there, but the long ones are always what helps. He's been dragging the bad out of me. I will never forget the one session where I couldn't go any further. I truly felt like He broke a part of me down. I know it was a lesson of the safe word, but I still think that was amazing.
I'm sure Daddy will be taking pictures for me to post. Keep an eye out :)
1. What I write about is coming from my end of things and how I am feeling at that moment.
2. No one else but Oliver is aware of what has happened in my past and He acts accordingly due to that knowledge.
3. Although I do enjoy chatting to people everywhere, in no way do I need to be saved from Oliver or to be told that He is doing things wrong. You see no one but He can be my Dom, because He is the only one that knows me and can know what is best for me.
Again, what I am writing here is coming from my perspective, my view. Oliver always has a perfect reason for doing what He does. I'm like that child complaining about it, when the parent knows better.
So Oliver and I had a good talk last night. He explained (actually more like spoke very sternly - even swore at me a few times) to me about a few things, and then pretty much told me He is sick of my shenanigan's and going forward He will no longer be so easy on me. I will be punished, and fierce. He explained that I will not like the punishments and that they will not be fun.
At the end of the conversation I felt completely scolded and upset. But guess what? It was exactly what I needed. I feel that my head is back in the right place now. Like something snapped and I am ready to begin being His perfect submissive. I think that I needed to see that when it comes down to it I really couldn't/can't "get one over" on Him. For some reason I needed some sort of proof or something in order to believe He really is in charge. Perhaps I had some sort of doubt? He's has now made it perfectly clear to me that He can be very stern and will be very stern if I pull any bs anymore. He's put that bit of fear in me that I needed. Now I have no desire to be punished. I'm scared of what the punishments will be. I don't want to know what they will be.
I hate to say it, but I'm very glad that this has happened. I feel so much better now.
I also have to say that I can no longer call Him Oliver because I don't think that it's appropriate. I can only call Him Daddy now. I feel that calling Him Oliver would be disrespectful, and that is something that I never want to be. There is another name I call Him as well, which I may use in the future. Captain. As He is the Captain of my life.
I am very much looking forward to Saturday. I very much need the physical from Him. Not that we haven't had little quick sessions here and there, but the long ones are always what helps. He's been dragging the bad out of me. I will never forget the one session where I couldn't go any further. I truly felt like He broke a part of me down. I know it was a lesson of the safe word, but I still think that was amazing.
I'm sure Daddy will be taking pictures for me to post. Keep an eye out :)
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